Kiss Me, Hermione
by FluffyPurpleBunny
Summary: Just when they thought their lives would be normal, a law comes and turns their world upside down! Hermione and Draco thrown together, but who will tame who? A Harry Potter tale set to the music of Cole Porter's Kiss Me, Kate.
1. Another Op'nin', Another Show

**A/N: This story is based off of the musical (mostly the songs) **_**Kiss Me, Kate, **_**with music and lyrics by Cole Porter, which is in turn based on **_**The Taming of the Shrew **_**by William Shakespeare. **

**Anti-Litigation Charm: All characters, settings, etc belong to J.K. Rowling. Anything else recognizable belongs to either Porter or Shakespeare. Only the plot is my own. **

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><p><em><strong>Another op'nin', another show<br>In Philly, Boston or Baltimo',  
>A chance for stage folks to say hello,<br>Another op'nin' of another show.**_

It was the beginning of a new school year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Although it had been a scarce four months since the Battle of Hogwarts and the defeat of Voldemort and his Death Eaters, Headmistress Minerva McGonagall wanted to school to begin on 1 September just as it normally would in order to maintain some semblance of normality. She thought that after such a traumatic event, the students and staff of Hogwarts would find comfort in the tradition and routine of the school year.

_**Another job that you hope, at last,  
>Will make your future forget your past,<br>Another pain where the ulcers grow,  
>Another op'nin' of another show.<strong>_

It was going to be a difficult school year. At one time, Hogwarts had served as the bastion of knowledge, enlightenment, and safety for Wizarding Great Britain. Now, however, it was merely a place of painful reminders, violence and fear, for the majority of the students. For many of them, it reminded them of being tortured by teachers and classmates, fearing being dragged out of class or the dormitories to be leverage to force family members to cooperate with the corrupt Ministry. For others, it was a reminder of how they had caved to the rule of the Carrow siblings, perpetrating those acts against their classmates.

Both Headmistress McGonagall and Minister Shacklebolt agreed, however, that no matter difficult, with proper support, it would be more beneficial to the community to reopen Hogwarts as soon as possible. Like an infected wound, it would heal better and more rapidly if wound was lanced and the infection removed rather than left to fester and putrify. Attendance was no longer compulsory, however, so anyone who did not feel comfortable returning was not required to do so. Despite concerns, this year would also have a record enrollment. All of the students would be repeating the previous year of school, as Muggleborns had not been allowed to attend and many of the students who had attended were forced to take refuge in the Room of Requirement midway through the school year.

_**Four weeks, you rehearse and rehearse,  
>Three weeks and it couldn't be worse,<br>One week, will it ever be right?  
>Then out o' the hat, it's that big first night!<strong>_

Making the castle fit for inhabitation was a massive project that required the time, effort, and money of much of wizarding community. Of course, all of the staff and house elves of Hogwarts worked full time on repairs. The Order of the Phoenix, family of the attending students and the population of Hogsmeade also contributed their labor and magic when possible. And after the war crimes trials, Hogwarts had another source of assistance as well.

The Death Eaters and active Voldemort supporters, in a sense of wicked revenge, contributed the most to the restoration of Wizarding Great Britain. It was agreed that the best way to prevent such an occurrence again was to demonstrate the direct negative consequences of their actions. All lower level Death Eaters and active, willing Voldemort supporters were sentenced to manual labor on the restoration of either Hogwarts or Diagon Alley in proportion with their crimes. Upper level Death Eaters and the financial supporters of Voldemort were also fined in proportion to their crimes and the wealth they possessed.

Fortunately, with Kingsley Shacklebolt as the Minister for Magic, the war reparations were determined objectively rather than punitively, with coercion taken into account. Because his work for and interaction the Prime Minister, Kingsley was very familiar with the history of Muggle Europe, and knew that the harsh measures inflicted on the losers of World War I in the Treaty of Versailles only served to create a larger conflict twenty years later in World War II.

Therefore, all sentences and reparations were kept within reason. Repayment was made in the form of gold only, no property or heirlooms were confiscated from the pureblooded supporters of the Dark Lord. Their children were only required to participate in a Muggle Studies and counseling course before being allowed to return to Hogwarts.

_**The overture is about to start,  
>You cross your fingers and hold your heart,<br>It's curtain time and away we go!  
>Another op'nin',<br>Just another op'nin' of another show.  
>Another op'nin', another show<strong>_

Harry, Hermione, Ron, and Ginny were playing two a side Quidditch in the yard in back of the Burrow the evening of August 31st.

"I am so excited to be going back to Hogwarts!" Hermione said as she struggled to catch the quaffle and maintain her seat on her broom.

"I just bet you are. You always were a bit mental," said Ron jokingly as he took the quaffle from Hermione. "And accepting the Head Girl position as well. Don't you want a chance to relax this year?"

"Nah," chimed in Harry. "I'm afraid that this year will be deadly dull. With no Voldemort to worry about, or escaped felons, or sadistic teachers to deal with, I think we will be bored out of our minds."

"How come we are going to Hogwarts anyway?" asked Ron. "I mean, I know why Hermione wants to go back, but why didn't you want to take Gawain Robards up on his offer to enter the Auror training program even without our N.E.W.T.S."

Harry's eyes darted to where Ginny sat, hovering on her broomstick, then quickly away again.

"Because, Ron," replied Harry, "For once in my life, I want to have a normal school year with my friends. Between my cousin Dudley and my occasional outbreaks of magic, my primary schooling wouldn't be considered normal, and I have been faced with challenges every year since entering Hogwarts. Being bored actually sounds rather appealing."

Hermione didn't miss the glance that Harry sent Ginny, though she chose not to mention it.

Little did they know that this year would be anything but normal or boring.

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><p><strong>AN: I know that it is a little dry at the beginning, but please bear with me. I wanted to give enough background to provide a solid foundation for the rest of the story. **

**Please review with your ideas/comments/constructive criticism. Let me know if you think I should continue the story. **

**Thank you! FluffyPurpleBunny**


	2. Why Can't You Behave?

**A/N: I am planning on writing one chapter per song in the musical, a total of twenty chapters. For the most part, I am trying to fit the story around the songs, but in some case (such as with this chapter) the song is so short that I use the opportunity to advance other parts of the plot. Please let me know what you think!**

**Thank you to Charizard and Just Your Above Average Malfoy for your reviews, and for everyone who added this story to their Story Alerts. **

**Anti-Litigation Charm: All characters, settings, etc. belong to J.K. Rowling. Anything else recognizable belongs to either Porter or Shakespeare. Only the plot is my own. **

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><p>The morning of September first dawned bright and early at the Burrow. Hermione awoke to a cacophony of sound: the ghoul rattling around in the attic, the sound of feet pounding on the rickety wooden staircase, and Mrs. Weasley's loud admonitions to get up and get ready to head to Kings' Cross Station. Squinting against the bright sunshine coming through the window, she took a minute to stretch languidly and savor the last moment of summer freedom.<p>

THUMP!

"GET UP, HERMIONE!" yelled Ginny as she jumped on the bed. "We only have an hour before the Ministry cars come to escort us to the train station."

"All right, all right, I'm getting up," moaned Hermione. When Ginny's back was turned, Hermione threw a pillow at her.

"Oh no, you did not just do that," screeched Ginny, seizing the pillow. "PILLOW FIGHT!" She swung the pillow at Hermione, who jumped on the bed to avoid it. Soon, the sounds of giggling and running around drowned out the rest of the noise in the Burrow.

"What is going on in here?" yelled Harry as he slowly opened the door and cautiously peered inside.

WHAM!

"Got you," giggled Ginny as she smacked her boyfriend in the face. When he regained his composure, Harry grabbed the pillow and refused to let go. Soon he and Ginny were engaged in a tickle fight over the pillow. Ron joined in the pillow fight right after Harry, the four of them battling it out, every man (or woman) for himself (or herself).

The fight was brought to a screeching halt when a bang sounded from doorway of the bedroom. The four students turned and looked sheepishly at Mrs. Weasley, who was standing in the entryway with her hands on her hips, a small smile playing around the corners of her mouth. She looked like she was torn between laughing and scolding them.

"Alright dears, that's enough," said Mrs. Weasley. "Take your trunks downstairs. The cars should be arriving shortly."

_**Why can't you behave?  
>Oh, why can't you behave?<br>After all the things you told me  
>And the promises that you gave,<br>Oh, why can't you behave?**_

Ron left to retrieve his trunk from his room near the attic while Hermione set about putting the room to rights with her wand.

"Harry, can you help me take my truck outside?" asked Ginny.

"Ginny, you turned seventeen three weeks age," said Harry, a small line furrowing the brow with the lightening scar. "Surely…"

But Ginny interrupted him midsentence. "Please, Harry." She flashed him a radiant smile.

"Uh, ok," replied Harry with a slight look of confusion on his face. "_Locomotor trunk_!"

The two of them walked in slightly awkward silence down the stairs and out to the front of the house. When they were outside, Harry let the trunk drop softly down onto the ground and turned to face Ginny."

"So, um, what did you want to talk about?" he asked quietly, avoiding her eyes and running his hands nervously through his untidy black hair.

"Look at me, please Harry," she said quietly, placing her hand under his chin and raising his green eyes to meet her brown ones. She smiled at him kindly. "I know that you haven't wanted to put any pressure on me, with, you know…" She paused to clear her throat, her eyes sparkling with unshed tears. "Fred's death, but I would like… I mean, if are interested that is… well, what I mean to say…"

"Ginny, will you be my girlfriend?" asked Harry, hoping that was what she was trying to say. He thought that her stuttering and blushing was endearing.

"Yes!" she cried as she flung her arms around his neck. Then she pulled away and looked him solemnly in the eye. "But Harry, I will warn you. It really hurt when you broke up with me last time, and with losing Fred and Tonks and Professor Lupin," she paused, shaking her head as if to clear it. "Anyway, this needs to be important to you. I want to know that it is serious…"

"Absolutely!" exclaimed Harry as her voice trailed away. They stared at each other for a moment, when Harry began to lean in very slowly, his eyes darting to her lips.

"OI!" came a voice nearby. "That's my sister. I don't want to watch you snogging her, even if you are dating."

"Ron, mate," said Harry exasperatedly, "You have the worst timing…"

"The worst timing for what?" inquired Hermione as she joined them in the front yard.

"Never you mind," said Ginny, shooting a glare at her older brother.

Mrs. Weasley bustled out the front door of the house. "Everybody read to go? Do you have everything? Books? Robes? Wand?"

"Yes mum," sighed Ron. "Can we go already? I see the cars driving up the lane."

And with that they were off to begin the new school year.

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><p>"Mum, stop fussing," said Draco Malfoy impatiently, swatting her hand away as she straightened his robes. "It's not like this is my time going to Hogwarts. In fact," he gave a self-deprecating sneer, "it should be a good deal safer for me this year."<p>

"Oh, Draco," Narcissa whispered, fluttering idly around her son. "How can you joke about something so horrible? Aren't you the least bit worried about going back there?"

"Well, it isn't as if the boy hasn't been back to the castle already, Cissa. We both have the callouses to prove it. Imagine, a Malfoy having callouses from menial labor…" Lucius' voice trailed away as he began expounding on the pride of the Malfoy family.

"But Lucius, the other students…"

"Now Cissa, stop worrying over something you can't control. Draco will carry himself with the pride and the dignity that becomes the scion of the House of Malfoy and he will perfectly alright." He clapped his son on the shoulder, looked him in the eye and gave him an encouraging nod.

"Do you have everything, Draco? Your trunk and broomstick?"

"Yes, mum," Draco sighed.

And with a loud CRACK the three Malfoys disapparated.

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><p>The Malfoys apparated onto Platform 9 ¾ just as the Weasley's, along with Harry and Hermione, pushed their way inconspicuously through the barrier. For a moment, the two parties just stared at one another, the tension palpable between them. After a moment of awkward silence, Harry strode toward the Malfoys.<p>

"Harry, no!" whispered Hermione as she moved to grab his arm, but he shrugged her off.

Draco and Lucius' hands twitched involuntarily toward their sleeves, but Harry held up his hands to show that he was unarmed. He approached Mrs. Malfoy and made a courtly bow.

"Mrs. Malfoy," he said in a carrying voice. "I would like to apologize to you for not coming to you sooner to thank you. Without your assistance and courage, I would be dead and the wizarding world would be under the control of Voldemort. We owe you a great deal. In fact, I, Harry James Potter, do acknowledge in the presence of these witnesses the life debt I owe you."

"I, Narcissa Carina Malfoy, do hereby absolve you of the debt you owe, for saving the life of my son, Draco Abraxas Malfoy, during the Battle of Hogwarts." She clasped his hand, and the magic swirled around them, formalizing the agreement.

"If you'll excuse me, I must go and put my trunk on the Hogwarts Express." With that, Harry made another little bow to Narcissa, nodded at the two Malfoy men, then turned and returned to the Weasley's, who were staring at him with gob smacked expressions.

"Now, Harry, what'd you go and do a thing like that for?" demanded Ron as soon as he got back to the Weasleys.

"That was brilliant!" exclaimed Hermione. "Don't you see Ron? Harry made sure to announce the life debt in one of the crowded platform to insure that everyone knows that they've put the past behind them."

"But Harry, they're the reason Fred is dead! How can you actually _apologize_ to them?" asked Ron, incensed.

"No, Ron, Augustus Rookwood is the reason Fred is dead," said Hermione emphatically. "Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy didn't even fight in the Battle of Hogwarts. They've been tried by the Wizengamot, paid their fines, and completed their sentences and educational courses. If we can't move on, then the war is bound to repeat itself."

Ron was aghast. "Hermione, how can you…"

But Hermione cut him off. "Now Ron, I am not saying that you have to be friends with the Malfoys, you don't even have to like them. But I do expect you to grow up and be civil to them!"

"You're mental! You're both mental!" cried Ron, and he turned and ran away.

_**Why can't you be good?  
>And do just as you should?<br>Why can't you turn a new leaf over,  
>So that your baby can be your slave,<br>Oh, why can't you behave?**_

"Oh, Ron," said Hermione as she entered the compartment that he sat in. I'm, I didn't mean to get so upset with you. It's just… I meant… well… you aren't the only one who lost family in this war!" she burst out, angry. "I lost my parents, in case you hadn't noticed!"

"Your parents aren't dead," Ron shot back, the tips of his ears beginning to turn red.

"They're as good as!" retorted Hermione. "They don't even know that they have a daughter, much less who I am." And with that, she burst into tears.

"I'm sorry Hermione." Ron pulled her down to sit by him and put his arm around her, letting her cry into his shoulder. "I shouldn't take my grief out on you. And of course losing your parents was hard."

"I'm sorry for yelling at you too," sniffled Hermione. "I don't like fighting with you."

"Now, why don't we put the sadness of the past behind us for a while and think of a happy future," said Ron. "I think I know what I want as my future:"_**  
><strong>_

_**There's a farm I know near my old home town,  
>Where we two can go and try settlin' down.<br>There I'll care for you forever,  
>Well, at least 'til you dig my grave.<br>Oh, why can't you behave?  
><strong>_

Little did they know that would never happen.

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><p><strong>AN: So originally, I was going to "cast" each role and have that character "singing" their part to the appropriate person. But as I started writing, that made it too complicated, as my first priority is keeping the characters in character. **

**Please review and let me know your thoughts/ ideas/ suggestions/ criticisms/ advice. I want to hear it all!**

**If anyone would be interested in betaing my story, please send me a PM!**

**FluffyPurpleBunny**


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